1/12 – Nintendo Switch Real-Time Thoughts

Sometimes, Twitter isn’t enough to accurately summate my thoughts on an ongoing event. So, I’ve decided to enclose my real-time thoughts, as they happen, on the hubbub and glamour that is the big Nintendo Switch reveal event. Enjoy my stream of consciousness.

[10:52pm] There’s a lot of flashing lights and EDM and raving going on. Promising.
[11:00pm] I need some glowsticks right now.
[11:02pm] Yep, the console we saw in the first trailer.
[11:03pm] March 3rd, nice. WORLDWIDE, very nice. $299, as expected.
[11:04pm] Whole bunch of online stuff, cool. They’re doing a paid online thing, too.
[11:05pm] NO MORE REGION LOCKING. THANK SWEET MERCIFUL CHRIST.
[11:07pm] So the Switch is an amalgamation of everything Nintendo.
[11:08pm] Mario Kart confirmed? Also, different “modes.”
[11:09pm] Screen battery ranges from 2.5 to 6.5 hours. Makes for an average of 4 hours and 30 minutes.
[11:10pm] USB-C connection is for charging. Neat.
[11:11pm] Man, those Joy-Con controllers are TINY.
[11:12pm] Screenshot and video capture button, very nice. I like.
[11:15pm] …why are we talking about ice cubes in a glass? Is this what Nintendo stockholders want?
[11:19pm] 1-2 Switch… um…… pack-in game.
[11:20pm] So you look in their eyes to play the game… interesting?
[11:21pm] It’s not a pack-in? Okay…
[11:22pm] Whaaaaaa…?
[11:23pm] Okay, so it’s a fighting game… in action, it looks pretty cool.
[11:24pm] “ARMS” – about as on the nose it gets. Does this run on the Pokken Tournament engine?
[11:26pm] “Ribbon Girl” – so Hestia’s in this game?
[11:27pm] Not a launch title, huh.
[11:28pm] SPLATOON YO
[11:29pm] SPLATOON 2 HELL YEAH
[11:30pm] Dual-wielding is going to happen. Prepare for the impending surplus of Kirito usernames.
[11:31pm] Summer? Note to self: hold off on getting a Switch until summer.
[11:32pm] Man, the English translator sounds like he’s on quaaludes.
[11:33pm] WELCOME TO NEW YORK, MARIO.
[11:34pm] Damn, this new Mario game looks wicked. Open world? I like.
[11:35pm] Super Mario Odyssey. Nice title.
[11:37pm] Not a launch title? REALLY? Come on, man.
[11:38pm] Something from Monolith Soft… what is this? …wha? Xenoblade Chronicles 2? WHAAAAA? That’s chronologically confusing.
[11:39pm] KOEI TECMO FIRE EMBLEM GET IN HERE
[11:40pm] Over 80 games in development. 20 more than the Wii U library’s total.
[11:41pm] Dragon Quest Heroes 1 and 2. Cool.
[11:41pm] ATLUS? Go on… wait, is this SMT?
[11:42pm] OH SHIT SMT 5 IS REAL….. I THINK
[11:43pm] Project Octopath Traveler… something new from Squeenix.
[11:44pm] Oh hey, we got a guy from SEGA here. 20 years ago, this would’ve NEVER happened.
[11:45pm] Todd Howard is announcing Skyrim for Switch. Already knew it, but cool.
[11:46pm] SUDA51, I’ve heard good things about this guy.
[11:47pm] Hey, translator dude – drink a can of Monster, please. Also, a new No More Heroes?
[11:48pm] …I HEARD PRO WRESTLING, GO ON.
[11:49pm] BOOOOOOOO SCREW OFF ELECTRONIC ARTS
[11:50pm] Oh joy, sports games on Switch. FIFA, whoop-dee-frigging-doo.
[11:52pm] AYYY SONIC CONFIRMED?
[11:53pm] XENOVERSE 2 I SAW IT
[11:54pm] Seriously, I need a confirmed list of games to look at right now.
[11:55pm] Product Configurations – aka, stuff for the stockholders.
[11:56pm] …that can’t be it, right?
[11:57pm] Hello Shibata, and everyone up early in Europe.
[11:58pm] AYYYY REGGIE IN NEW YORK
[11:59pm] Theeeeeeere’s Zelda.
[12:00am] MIYAMOTO-SAN, KONBANWA!
[12:00am] Come on, out with the launch date…
[12:01am] STOP PUTTING IT OFF GAHHHHHD
[12:02am] New Zelda footage? That music is awesome, too.
[12:03am] This looks beautiful, absolutely beautiful.
[12:04am] There’s voice acting in this game and it is gooooooooood.
[12:05am] FUCKING LAUNCH TITLE YEAHHHHH

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